1
00:00:02,628 --> 00:00:04,796
Wow, dude.
This thing is disgusting.
2
00:00:04,880 --> 00:00:07,549
There's so much rust.
Maybe we should wipe it with a wet rag.
3
00:00:07,633 --> 00:00:09,510
- I'm not gonna do that!
- Why not?
4
00:00:09,593 --> 00:00:11,970
Because it's a goddamn circuit breaker,
Mac. We'll get electrocuted.
5
00:00:12,054 --> 00:00:13,764
No, I'm just gonna use
this screwdriver, all right?
6
00:00:13,889 --> 00:00:15,516
It's got a rubber handle.
That'll keep me grounded.
7
00:00:15,599 --> 00:00:18,101
I'm pretty sure you have to be
standing on rubber.
8
00:00:18,185 --> 00:00:20,854
- Well, the bottoms of my shoes are rubber.
- Oh, no! You know what it is?
9
00:00:20,938 --> 00:00:22,606
You can't be standing
on the ground at all.
10
00:00:22,689 --> 00:00:24,900
- Maybe jump up into midair and do it.
- Hmm?
11
00:00:24,983 --> 00:00:27,819
Yeah. If you jump
into the air and grab a live wire,
12
00:00:27,903 --> 00:00:29,488
you won't get electrocuted.
13
00:00:29,571 --> 00:00:32,282
But then if you land on the ground
and you're still holding that wire,
14
00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:35,244
you'll be blown to bits.
I saw it in Tango & Cash.
15
00:00:35,369 --> 00:00:37,079
So I'm supposed
to risk my life based on something
16
00:00:37,162 --> 00:00:38,997
that you saw in Tango & Cash?
17
00:00:40,082 --> 00:00:41,625
- Kurt Russell, I think…
- I'm gonna jam this thing
18
00:00:41,792 --> 00:00:42,960
with a screwdriver, all right?
19
00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:44,503
The rubber handle will ground me.
And I'll be safe.
20
00:00:44,586 --> 00:00:46,421
- All right. Give it a shot.
- Okay.
21
00:00:46,547 --> 00:00:47,923
- It's all set to scrape…
- Oh, my God!
22
00:00:48,006 --> 00:00:49,091
Holy shit!
23
00:00:49,174 --> 00:00:51,218
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
What the hell are you doing?
24
00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:52,845
- It exploded.
- You're making it worse!
25
00:00:52,928 --> 00:00:54,763
You gotta pay somebody to fix this.
26
00:00:54,847 --> 00:00:56,765
No! I'm tired of spending my money
27
00:00:56,849 --> 00:00:58,892
every time something goes wrong here.
28
00:00:58,976 --> 00:01:00,894
We can't fix it!
It's too dangerous!
29
00:01:00,978 --> 00:01:03,272
- It scared the shit out of me, man.
- Well, get Charlie to do it.
30
00:01:03,355 --> 00:01:04,439
He won't go near it.
31
00:01:04,523 --> 00:01:06,275
He's already been
electrocuted, like, 500 times.
32
00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:07,943
Yeah, man. I think
he's starting to catch on to that.
33
00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:09,444
Dennis, go get me a harness
34
00:01:09,570 --> 00:01:11,363
'cause I'll have to be
swinging in the air to do this.
35
00:01:11,446 --> 00:01:12,990
- Are you kidding me?
- I told you.
36
00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:14,533
Did you get the flashlights?
37
00:01:14,616 --> 00:01:16,994
Forget about the flashlights!
Check these bad boys out!
38
00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:18,287
- They fell off the back of a truck.
- Huh?
39
00:01:18,412 --> 00:01:20,664
- Nice grab.
- But what about the flashlights?
40
00:01:20,747 --> 00:01:22,708
Uh, I'm sorry.
Someone wasn't paying attention, right?
41
00:01:22,791 --> 00:01:24,960
- Free speakers! Free speakers for the bar!
- Speakers!
42
00:01:25,043 --> 00:01:26,253
Mac, let's plug these bad boys in.
43
00:01:26,378 --> 00:01:27,588
- Yeah!
- We don't have any electricity!
44
00:01:27,713 --> 00:01:29,673
- That's why we needed the flashlight.
- Careful!
45
00:01:29,756 --> 00:01:31,592
I'm sorry. I didn't…
46
00:01:31,675 --> 00:01:33,427
- Holy shit.
- What is that?
47
00:01:35,387 --> 00:01:36,972
- Oh, my God.
- Whoa.
48
00:01:37,055 --> 00:01:38,640
That's a big bag of drugs.
49
00:01:38,724 --> 00:01:39,933
This is not good, dude.
50
00:01:40,017 --> 00:01:41,101
Somebody's gonna be looking
for those drugs.
51
00:01:41,185 --> 00:01:43,228
Relax, dude. They're gonna be
shit out of luck 'cause no one…
52
00:01:43,312 --> 00:01:45,480
No one saw us take the speakers. Did they?
53
00:01:45,564 --> 00:01:48,066
- See us take…
- No.
54
00:01:48,150 --> 00:01:50,736
There you have it.
Look, let's not worry or panic.
55
00:01:50,819 --> 00:01:52,988
This is…
This is a lot of drugs.
56
00:01:53,071 --> 00:01:55,449
But, like, what's the worst
that could happen?
57
00:02:30,526 --> 00:02:31,527
Gotta get rid of it.
58
00:02:31,610 --> 00:02:33,237
Yeah. Drugs are bad news.
Let's get rid of it.
59
00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:36,156
- Throw it in the garbage.
- You can't do that, a kid could find it.
60
00:02:36,240 --> 00:02:37,533
- Right.
- Burn it.
61
00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:39,076
Well, then we're dealing
with a fume situation.
62
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:40,202
Yeah. You gotta wear masks and…
63
00:02:40,327 --> 00:02:41,411
It's a whole thing…
64
00:02:41,495 --> 00:02:42,913
It's a whole production.
It's a big production.
65
00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,164
Then bury it!
66
00:02:44,248 --> 00:02:45,999
No, see. Now we're back to the kids again.
67
00:02:46,083 --> 00:02:48,335
- Kids run with shovels, playing in dirt.
- Absolutely.
68
00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:50,546
- And then one of them's gonna…
- Okay. Call the police.
69
00:02:50,629 --> 00:02:53,298
What, are we gonna
just solve society's drug problem?
70
00:02:53,382 --> 00:02:54,633
- You know what I mean?
- Is that on us?
71
00:02:54,716 --> 00:02:55,801
- No!
- Is that on us now?
72
00:02:55,884 --> 00:02:57,344
The community is still
going down the toilet.
73
00:02:57,427 --> 00:02:59,721
So I think what you're saying, Sweet Dee,
is that we could use
74
00:02:59,805 --> 00:03:02,349
- the unsolvable drug problem in society…
- Mmm-hmm.
75
00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:04,935
…to fix the solvable
light problem in our bar.
76
00:03:05,060 --> 00:03:06,270
- Yes.
- I hear you.
77
00:03:06,395 --> 00:03:08,355
We're saying we're gonna do the drugs,
78
00:03:08,438 --> 00:03:10,023
- and then try and fix all the lights.
- No.
79
00:03:10,107 --> 00:03:11,525
- Charlie didn't understand that.
- That's asinine.
80
00:03:11,608 --> 00:03:13,485
- You want to rewind?
- Yeah, we're gonna flip the drugs.
81
00:03:13,569 --> 00:03:16,363
Make a bunch of money.
Use that money to fix the electricity.
82
00:03:16,446 --> 00:03:18,365
All right. Well, both ways work.
I kinda like my way…
83
00:03:18,448 --> 00:03:19,908
- Great plan.
- Your way's terrible.
84
00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,243
- I'm in. Let's sell these drugs.
- You're not in.
85
00:03:21,368 --> 00:03:23,245
And you're not gonna sell them.
We'll do it, Charlie.
86
00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:24,913
Because we found the drugs.
87
00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:26,456
- And you're bossy.
- Very bossy.
88
00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:28,333
- I'm not bossy.
- Scumbags!
89
00:03:28,417 --> 00:03:30,419
Frank, come on, man.
Look, we're trying to get some money
90
00:03:30,502 --> 00:03:32,504
to fix the lights in our bar
because you won't give it to us.
91
00:03:32,588 --> 00:03:36,717
Back in my day, only the biggest
pieces of shit dealt drugs.
92
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:38,594
- We're not gonna deal drugs.
- Yeah, right.
93
00:03:38,677 --> 00:03:41,013
- We're gonna flip it once.
- A one-time flip.
94
00:03:41,096 --> 00:03:42,848
- Yeah.
- We'll go to that shady guy, Bingo.
95
00:03:42,931 --> 00:03:44,975
- Oh, Bingo.
- We'll say "Here's a pile of drugs.
96
00:03:45,100 --> 00:03:46,894
- "Give us some money." Then…
- Oh, no, no.
97
00:03:46,977 --> 00:03:49,146
You don't go to Bingo.
Bingo is my contact.
98
00:03:49,271 --> 00:03:51,190
I'm sorry.
I don't think you can call dibs
99
00:03:51,273 --> 00:03:53,108
- on a shady people-smuggler.
- You can't do that.
100
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:55,444
Just do not mention my name!
101
00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:58,113
- My God.
- Relax. No one's gonna mention your name.
102
00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:00,741
Hey, Bingo. Frank sent us.
103
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:04,745
Frank, huh? I'm gonna skin
that son of a bitch and wear his face.
104
00:04:04,828 --> 00:04:06,538
- What's up?
- We're trying…
105
00:04:06,622 --> 00:04:08,123
- Don't look at me.
- Excuse me?
106
00:04:08,207 --> 00:04:09,249
Look up. Up.
107
00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:10,417
- Okay.
- Is this good?
108
00:04:10,501 --> 00:04:12,336
That's fine. Now speak.
109
00:04:12,419 --> 00:04:14,755
Uh, okay. Uh, well, listen, Bingo.
110
00:04:14,838 --> 00:04:17,799
We got a bucket of nose clams
fresh from the sea.
111
00:04:17,883 --> 00:04:21,970
Sweet, delicious nose clams that are
looking for a home if you follow me.
112
00:04:22,054 --> 00:04:23,388
- Nose clams?
- No. I don't follow you.
113
00:04:23,472 --> 00:04:25,599
I don't know what you're talking about.
114
00:04:25,724 --> 00:04:29,186
It's not confusing.
Just everybody settle down.
115
00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:30,938
These are the kind of nose clams
116
00:04:31,021 --> 00:04:33,190
that make you want
to dance the night away.
117
00:04:33,607 --> 00:04:35,192
I don't get what the hell
you're talking about.
118
00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:37,236
- I don't even know what you're saying.
- It's so obvious!
119
00:04:37,319 --> 00:04:39,613
You know what? It's not obvious.
Now you're being too vague.
120
00:04:39,696 --> 00:04:41,323
You're talking about dancing clams.
121
00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:44,243
- What's gonna make you dance?
- These are the kind of nose clams
122
00:04:44,326 --> 00:04:46,328
that you crush up into
a line of white powder
123
00:04:46,453 --> 00:04:49,122
and you snort them up through your nose.
And they make you high.
124
00:04:49,206 --> 00:04:52,125
You use a dollar bill or a straw to do it.
They come from Colombia.
125
00:04:52,209 --> 00:04:54,795
They're illegal.
And they rhyme with "propane."
126
00:04:54,878 --> 00:04:56,839
Perfect. You found
a perfect medium ground there.
127
00:04:56,922 --> 00:04:58,674
- So you wanna sell me cocaine?
- Yes!
128
00:04:58,757 --> 00:05:00,008
Why didn't you just
come out and say that?
129
00:05:00,092 --> 00:05:01,552
- Instead of dancing around it.
- That is so tacky.
130
00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:04,304
- We talked about it on the way over.
- It's not tacky.
131
00:05:04,388 --> 00:05:08,141
That is the kindergarten behavior
of drug dealing. Do you want them or not?
132
00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:09,518
- Yeah, of course I do.
- Oh, great.
133
00:05:09,643 --> 00:05:10,727
- Well, here you go.
- Thank you.
134
00:05:10,853 --> 00:05:12,354
- Eyes, boom.
- Yeah.
135
00:05:16,024 --> 00:05:18,485
Oh! Oh!
136
00:05:18,569 --> 00:05:20,696
Youse two.
We need to talk to youse. Huh?
137
00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:22,656
Shit. Are you guys gangsters?
138
00:05:22,739 --> 00:05:23,824
Shut up!
139
00:05:23,907 --> 00:05:26,076
Ah, owe me a coke. Listen.
140
00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:28,412
Rumor has it that somebody
who works at this bar,
141
00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:30,497
found a certain somethin'
that belongs to us.
142
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:32,666
A certain somethin'
which may or may not
143
00:05:32,749 --> 00:05:34,543
have fallen off a certain truck.
144
00:05:34,626 --> 00:05:37,546
And the certain somebody that we know
thinks they saw that certain someone
145
00:05:37,629 --> 00:05:39,923
pick it up and take it
back to a certain bar,
146
00:05:40,007 --> 00:05:43,468
which may or may not be the place
that we happen to be or not be
147
00:05:43,552 --> 00:05:46,096
talkin' to a couple of certain somebodies
right this very second.
148
00:05:46,180 --> 00:05:47,431
- Capisce?
- Huh?
149
00:05:49,725 --> 00:05:51,602
Fellas, we're about six beers' deep
150
00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:53,437
so I think you're gonna have to
151
00:05:53,562 --> 00:05:55,856
be a little bit more clear
'cause I didn't get that last part.
152
00:05:55,939 --> 00:05:58,025
I… I missed out
on the whole thing to be honest with you.
153
00:05:58,108 --> 00:06:00,402
I was confused by it.
I'm very confused by the…
154
00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:03,197
I was confused by the whole thing
if I'm being honest.
155
00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:07,117
Look, why don't you
just return what belongs to us?
156
00:06:07,201 --> 00:06:11,622
Or pay us the 25 G's
that it's worth, and we'll be square.
157
00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:13,373
Youse got until Friday, huh?
158
00:06:13,582 --> 00:06:14,791
What happens on Friday?
159
00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:16,543
Oh…
160
00:06:16,627 --> 00:06:18,921
Well, Friday is the day
161
00:06:19,004 --> 00:06:23,592
that we may or may not be forced
to chop your limbs off
162
00:06:23,675 --> 00:06:29,306
and distribute them evenly
amongst your friends and your family.
163
00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:30,641
And that's Friday.
164
00:06:32,142 --> 00:06:34,019
- Friday.
- Okay.
165
00:06:34,102 --> 00:06:37,314
Well, thanks, gentlemen. That's…
That's very… A very clear message.
166
00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:39,608
- We'll certainly get on that right away.
- Yeah.
167
00:06:39,942 --> 00:06:41,944
Okay. That's much appreciated.
168
00:06:42,069 --> 00:06:43,487
Uh, good day to youse.
169
00:06:43,612 --> 00:06:46,823
- And good day to youse. Come on.
- Huh?
170
00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,492
Chewin' in my ear all the time.
171
00:06:48,575 --> 00:06:50,077
- Let's go already.
- Come on. Come on. Come on.
172
00:06:50,494 --> 00:06:51,828
Holy shit!
173
00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:59,378
Guess who sold the drugs
and we can fix the lights now
174
00:06:59,461 --> 00:07:00,963
- The lights are fixed.
- Yeah, man.
175
00:07:01,046 --> 00:07:02,548
No shit.
How'd you do that?
176
00:07:02,631 --> 00:07:03,715
We got bigger problems
than that, dude.
177
00:07:03,799 --> 00:07:06,260
The drugs that you sold,
they belong to the mob.
178
00:07:06,343 --> 00:07:07,886
- What?
- Yeah, they saw you guys.
179
00:07:07,970 --> 00:07:10,430
Guys, real-life actual gangsters.
It was pretty cool.
180
00:07:10,514 --> 00:07:12,349
- They came to the bar. They threatened us.
- It was not cool!
181
00:07:12,474 --> 00:07:14,518
Look! The point is,
we're gonna give them the money
182
00:07:14,643 --> 00:07:15,853
that you got from
Bingo. So it's…
183
00:07:16,019 --> 00:07:18,438
Cool. And then maybe
we can keep a little for ourselves too.
184
00:07:18,522 --> 00:07:19,606
- How much did you get?
- Perfect.
185
00:07:19,690 --> 00:07:22,860
- Oh, dude, a one, a two, a $300!
- Hello.
186
00:07:22,985 --> 00:07:25,153
You guys, those drugs
were worth 25 grand!
187
00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:27,281
Oh, shit!
Are you serious?
188
00:07:27,364 --> 00:07:28,574
- Yes!
- Now, see now? I told you.
189
00:07:28,657 --> 00:07:30,242
- I asked for more money.
- What?
190
00:07:30,325 --> 00:07:31,577
- Yes, I did.
- No, you didn't!
191
00:07:31,660 --> 00:07:34,913
I was using dead presidents as a cover.
You didn't get that?
192
00:07:34,997 --> 00:07:38,125
He said to the man he wanted
many thousands of green people
193
00:07:38,208 --> 00:07:39,501
from history times.
194
00:07:39,585 --> 00:07:41,461
Oh, my God.
We are so screwed.
195
00:07:41,545 --> 00:07:43,463
- How are we gonna get 25 grand by Friday?
- I get that.
196
00:07:46,758 --> 00:07:48,969
Don't look at me.
You made this bed.
197
00:07:49,052 --> 00:07:51,763
You're sleeping in it.
This is a life lesson for you.
198
00:07:51,847 --> 00:07:53,849
This is not the time to be
throwing down life lessons, all right?
199
00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:56,727
We are going to get whacked off
by a bunch of scary Italian guys.
200
00:07:56,810 --> 00:07:57,895
Did they say they were
gonna whack us off?
201
00:07:58,020 --> 00:07:59,563
They implied they wanted
to whack us all off!
202
00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:02,524
Nobody's gonna get
whacked off today, okay? Listen.
203
00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:04,943
We're gonna take the money.
We'll go get our drugs back from Bingo.
204
00:08:05,027 --> 00:08:07,362
We'll give it to the mob
and pretend none of this ever happened.
205
00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:08,906
- And this time, I'll do the talking!
- Okay.
206
00:08:09,031 --> 00:08:10,490
Just keep my name out of it.
207
00:08:10,866 --> 00:08:12,743
Frank said to tell you
to sell us back our drugs.
208
00:08:12,993 --> 00:08:15,204
- Okay. No problem.
- Good. Good.
209
00:08:15,329 --> 00:08:16,747
- Great.
- Excellent.
210
00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:18,540
- Five thousand dollars.
- What?
211
00:08:18,624 --> 00:08:21,376
- Oh, boy!
- An hour ago, you gave us $300 for 'em.
212
00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:23,212
- Yeah, man.
- I don't recall that.
213
00:08:23,295 --> 00:08:25,005
- Come on!
- All right.
214
00:08:25,088 --> 00:08:26,757
What can we get
for $300 then?
215
00:08:27,174 --> 00:08:29,968
You want an exotic bird?
216
00:08:30,052 --> 00:08:31,345
If you're gonna play this game,
217
00:08:31,428 --> 00:08:32,638
we need to buy something from you
218
00:08:32,721 --> 00:08:35,557
that we can sell back
to other people at a higher price.
219
00:08:35,682 --> 00:08:37,518
Okay. Oxycontin.
220
00:08:37,601 --> 00:08:39,937
It's a very popular pill these days.
221
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:41,730
I happen to have a shitload of it.
222
00:08:41,939 --> 00:08:43,273
- How much?
- $1,200.
223
00:08:43,398 --> 00:08:45,776
- Oh, boy. Wow.
- That's gonna…
224
00:08:45,901 --> 00:08:48,278
- Bingo! Wow.
- Goodness gracious with this guy.
225
00:08:48,403 --> 00:08:50,614
- If it's not one thing it's another thing.
- Oh, okay.
226
00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:51,907
Think about it this way.
227
00:08:51,990 --> 00:08:53,825
If we split it,
it's only a few hundred dollars each.
228
00:08:53,909 --> 00:08:56,578
- Great.
- I'll just go grab cash from my money tree
229
00:08:56,662 --> 00:08:59,206
- that I have planted.
- I know a leprechaun with a pot of gold.
230
00:08:59,289 --> 00:09:00,666
He lives at the end of my street.
231
00:09:00,749 --> 00:09:02,417
Maybe I'll go to a bank and say, "Hello.
232
00:09:02,501 --> 00:09:04,253
- "Do I have an account here?"
- Call Donald Trump!
233
00:09:04,962 --> 00:09:08,799
How do three men in their 30s
not have $800 between them?
234
00:09:10,968 --> 00:09:13,470
- They're…
- The economy is in shambles.
235
00:09:13,554 --> 00:09:16,473
- Have you seen the marketplace right now?
- The NASDAQ!
236
00:09:16,598 --> 00:09:17,808
- Dow Jones!
- It's up then down.
237
00:09:17,933 --> 00:09:21,103
Stop talking, God damn it!
Fine! I'll do it!
238
00:09:21,186 --> 00:09:23,647
- I'm not getting my money back, am I?
- Give us money.
239
00:09:25,774 --> 00:09:26,775
Boom.
240
00:09:26,859 --> 00:09:28,235
What am I supposed to do with that?
241
00:09:28,318 --> 00:09:30,821
- You tell us.
- Bingo said you knew how to sell drugs.
242
00:09:30,946 --> 00:09:33,866
I told you not to involve me!
Did you mention my name?
243
00:09:33,949 --> 00:09:36,201
- First thing we did.
- You gonna harp on it all day?
244
00:09:36,285 --> 00:09:38,620
God damn it!
The guy's gonna skin me alive.
245
00:09:38,704 --> 00:09:40,664
- He is gonna skin you alive.
- He mentioned something about it.
246
00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:43,083
Will you just pay the mob off
so we don't have to sell these pills?
247
00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:45,627
Dennis, I am not using
any more of my money!
248
00:09:45,711 --> 00:09:48,672
- The mob is gonna kill us, man!
- Look, if I cave on this,
249
00:09:48,755 --> 00:09:51,175
I'm gonna be bailing you guys out
for the rest of my life.
250
00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:52,926
- So…
- I'm putting my foot down on this one.
251
00:09:53,010 --> 00:09:55,095
You bitches gotta earn
your own money!
252
00:09:55,179 --> 00:09:57,181
Fine! Whatever!
It doesn't matter.
253
00:09:57,306 --> 00:10:00,309
- 'Cause, seeing as how I'm the boss…
- You're not the boss.
254
00:10:00,392 --> 00:10:02,728
Yes, I am.
I've come up with an excellent idea.
255
00:10:02,811 --> 00:10:05,480
Frank, you are gonna get us into that
country club that you used to belong to.
256
00:10:05,564 --> 00:10:07,316
We're gonna sell the pills there.
257
00:10:07,399 --> 00:10:09,610
- That'd be a good place to sell the pills.
- Yes. Thank you very much.
258
00:10:09,693 --> 00:10:12,863
You can't make no $25,000
from that amount of pills.
259
00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:13,989
How long you got?
260
00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:15,365
- Till Friday.
- Mmm-mmm.
261
00:10:15,449 --> 00:10:18,452
You'll have to turn a trick or two.
Go into prostitution.
262
00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:21,413
You are disgusting!
How could you suggest…
263
00:10:21,496 --> 00:10:23,415
I am absolutely not doing that!
264
00:10:23,498 --> 00:10:25,042
I wasn't talking about you.
265
00:10:25,125 --> 00:10:27,461
Guys at those country clubs
get hotter broads than you.
266
00:10:27,544 --> 00:10:28,587
- I would think, yeah.
- Yeah.
267
00:10:28,670 --> 00:10:33,217
I was saying the male escort
is really hard to come by.
268
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:35,302
I'm picking up what you're putting down.
269
00:10:35,385 --> 00:10:36,637
- I'll do it.
- Oh…
270
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:39,640
Uh, Charlie,
you're not quite cut from the right cloth.
271
00:10:39,723 --> 00:10:41,558
- What?
- Okay. Make it me.
272
00:10:41,683 --> 00:10:44,061
Mac, you're too low class.
All those women are gonna think
273
00:10:44,186 --> 00:10:45,562
they're gonna catch
somethin' from you.
274
00:10:45,729 --> 00:10:47,397
- They are.
- They will.
275
00:10:47,564 --> 00:10:49,191
I was thinking about Dennis.
276
00:10:49,858 --> 00:10:51,777
Now, Frank, will any of these women
277
00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:53,278
be attractive in any way?
278
00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:55,239
- Probably not.
- Then I'm not going to do it.
279
00:10:55,322 --> 00:10:56,448
Let's sell some drugs.
280
00:10:56,532 --> 00:10:57,533
- I got it.
- Why are you grabbing it?
281
00:10:57,616 --> 00:10:59,159
- Very grabby. Really?
- Get out.
282
00:11:04,665 --> 00:11:07,251
Okay. I think we gotta look for old ladies
with lots of big jewelry.
283
00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:09,920
- They got the deepest pockets.
- Ah, that's my girl.
284
00:11:10,212 --> 00:11:12,589
Dennis, I think you should unbutton
this button too.
285
00:11:12,673 --> 00:11:15,175
- Show a little chest.
- Frank, I know what you're trying to do.
286
00:11:15,259 --> 00:11:17,845
I'm not gonna be a whore.
Just drop it. All right?
287
00:11:18,679 --> 00:11:20,848
Holy shit.
Did you guys see that midget
288
00:11:20,973 --> 00:11:22,140
dressed like a lawn jockey?
289
00:11:22,474 --> 00:11:24,768
- That's a jockey, Charlie.
- Do what, now?
290
00:11:24,852 --> 00:11:26,144
That's a real jockey.
291
00:11:26,895 --> 00:11:29,147
The ones that ride on the horses…
Forget it!
292
00:11:29,231 --> 00:11:31,149
- Really?
- Wait. They have horses here?
293
00:11:31,233 --> 00:11:32,442
There's a racetrack next door, dude.
294
00:11:33,068 --> 00:11:34,987
- Bye-bye.
- What? No!
295
00:11:35,070 --> 00:11:36,280
- Where are you going, man?
- Where are you going?
296
00:11:36,446 --> 00:11:37,698
All right, whatever!
Let's split up.
297
00:11:37,781 --> 00:11:39,825
- I call Dennis.
- No. I'm not gonna be a whore, Frank.
298
00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:42,953
You're already a whore.
Why not make some money at it?
299
00:11:43,036 --> 00:11:44,705
You're just gonna try
and make me bang old ladies.
300
00:11:44,788 --> 00:11:45,956
And then you're gonna
have me move on to dudes.
301
00:11:46,123 --> 00:11:48,584
- I just wanna hang out.
- We're wasting time. Dee! Let's split up!
302
00:11:48,667 --> 00:11:49,751
Come on!
303
00:11:52,546 --> 00:11:55,424
Oh, that's good, huh?
You like that?
304
00:11:55,591 --> 00:11:56,842
It's a real beaut, huh?
305
00:11:57,134 --> 00:11:58,677
Holy shit. You can talk?
306
00:11:58,886 --> 00:12:00,387
- What?
- That is great.
307
00:12:00,470 --> 00:12:04,141
I would've figured if anything,
your voice would be like super high.
308
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:05,350
Well, good for you.
309
00:12:05,475 --> 00:12:08,145
She normally doesn't take to strangers.
She must like you, huh?
310
00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:10,939
Yeah. Wow.
She seems like a real nice horse.
311
00:12:11,023 --> 00:12:13,817
Actually, she kicked
the last stable boy's brains in.
312
00:12:13,901 --> 00:12:15,986
- He takes his food through a straw now.
- I bet.
313
00:12:16,195 --> 00:12:19,281
Hey, you wouldn't be
interested in taking his job, would ya?
314
00:12:20,115 --> 00:12:21,283
I'd be very interested.
315
00:12:21,366 --> 00:12:23,493
You have any qualms
about picking up shit?
316
00:12:23,744 --> 00:12:25,579
Terrific. Terrific.
317
00:12:25,662 --> 00:12:29,166
Usually, we'd use a shovel for that.
But to each his own, I guess.
318
00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:31,043
- Not me.
- Why don't you come and meet the fellas?
319
00:12:31,126 --> 00:12:33,253
All right.
320
00:12:33,462 --> 00:12:35,297
Oh, right. Good work.
321
00:12:39,510 --> 00:12:42,679
Okay. Now, there's only one thing
that these rich old men understand.
322
00:12:42,763 --> 00:12:46,725
And that is money. So I am gonna play
the role of a high-powered executive.
323
00:12:46,808 --> 00:12:49,019
- Mmm.
- You are going to be my secretary, Linda.
324
00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:52,648
Ooh! No. No.
I will be your business partner.
325
00:12:52,773 --> 00:12:54,566
Dee, these guys are old school, okay?
326
00:12:54,650 --> 00:12:56,735
They don't like women's rights.
Now, don't give me any lip!
327
00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:59,947
Okay, Linda. The first thing I need you
to do is get Jameson on the phone
328
00:13:00,072 --> 00:13:03,075
and tell him I don't need
his $650,000 investment.
329
00:13:03,158 --> 00:13:06,495
- He can shove it right back up his ass.
- Oh, I got a better idea, Bob.
330
00:13:06,578 --> 00:13:08,747
- How about you do it?
- What's that?
331
00:13:08,872 --> 00:13:11,542
Yeah. I think you should get Jameson
on the phone for me.
332
00:13:11,917 --> 00:13:13,585
Well, why would I do that, Linda?
333
00:13:13,669 --> 00:13:15,462
You're my secretary and a woman.
334
00:13:15,546 --> 00:13:17,548
What do you know about investing?
335
00:13:17,631 --> 00:13:18,841
Oh, I'm sorry, Bob.
336
00:13:18,924 --> 00:13:21,426
Remind me again what
we're having Jameson invest in?
337
00:13:22,594 --> 00:13:25,639
Jameson is investing
in new technologies.
338
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:27,140
Really? Which ones?
339
00:13:27,266 --> 00:13:28,809
- Lasers.
- Lasers!
340
00:13:28,934 --> 00:13:31,103
- Yep.
- That is adorable.
341
00:13:31,186 --> 00:13:32,688
Lasers, Linda!
342
00:13:32,813 --> 00:13:34,189
Who wants to buy some drugs?
343
00:13:39,319 --> 00:13:42,447
Hey, man. You workin'?
344
00:13:43,115 --> 00:13:46,201
- Excuse me?
- Don't play dumb with me, hermano.
345
00:13:46,285 --> 00:13:48,453
I know a gigolo when I see one.
346
00:13:48,537 --> 00:13:51,039
No, look,
I'm not a gigolo, all right?
347
00:13:51,123 --> 00:13:52,708
- For real?
- Yeah.
348
00:13:53,333 --> 00:13:56,545
A good-looking guy like you
could do very well in my business.
349
00:13:56,628 --> 00:13:58,797
Thanks. But I'm not really into
banging old ladies.
350
00:13:59,173 --> 00:14:00,299
Bang them?
351
00:14:01,300 --> 00:14:04,845
No, bro. You got it all wrong, man.
These women are classy.
352
00:14:04,928 --> 00:14:07,347
Yeah, they just want
someone to be nice to them.
353
00:14:07,431 --> 00:14:08,682
Flirt a little bit. That's it.
354
00:14:09,016 --> 00:14:10,142
Really?
355
00:14:10,225 --> 00:14:12,352
- I wouldn't have to bang these ladies?
- No.
356
00:14:12,477 --> 00:14:15,022
Bro, it's all fancy
dinners, exotic vacations.
357
00:14:15,147 --> 00:14:17,900
These ladies have so much cash, man.
It's the life.
358
00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:20,152
You should really think about it.
359
00:14:20,736 --> 00:14:22,154
You could make a killing here, bro.
360
00:14:23,822 --> 00:14:24,990
Huh.
361
00:14:27,534 --> 00:14:29,953
Hey.
362
00:14:30,287 --> 00:14:31,788
- Nice work.
- Hey, thanks, man.
363
00:14:31,872 --> 00:14:33,540
- Oh, that's yours.
- Thank you very much.
364
00:14:33,624 --> 00:14:35,959
- Yours. Thank you.
- Hey, man. You said $20.
365
00:14:36,627 --> 00:14:38,629
Take it or leave it.
366
00:14:38,712 --> 00:14:40,088
Hey, whatever, homes.
367
00:14:43,383 --> 00:14:44,801
Puta pendejo.
368
00:14:56,063 --> 00:14:59,900
Man, these guys are crazy.
I can't believe they bought all my pills.
369
00:15:00,150 --> 00:15:01,318
Ah, you know what they say.
370
00:15:01,443 --> 00:15:03,529
Nobody parties like a jockey!
371
00:15:03,612 --> 00:15:05,364
I was not familiar with
that expression, buster.
372
00:15:05,447 --> 00:15:06,698
I didn't even know
you guys could talk.
373
00:15:06,782 --> 00:15:08,992
So you want that job or not?
374
00:15:09,076 --> 00:15:10,410
I tell you what.
375
00:15:10,494 --> 00:15:12,496
I got a little something
I gotta straighten out with the mafia.
376
00:15:12,579 --> 00:15:13,872
- You know how that goes, right?
- Oh, sure.
377
00:15:13,956 --> 00:15:15,791
But when that's done, maybe.
378
00:15:15,874 --> 00:15:17,835
Because there's something
about that horse, buster.
379
00:15:17,918 --> 00:15:19,419
You know,
it's like we looked at each other.
380
00:15:19,503 --> 00:15:20,754
And then there was eye contact.
381
00:15:20,838 --> 00:15:22,798
And I was looking at the horse,
and the horse was looking at me.
382
00:15:22,881 --> 00:15:25,008
And then it hit me, I think, maybe,
383
00:15:25,092 --> 00:15:26,802
I was a centaur in my past life.
384
00:15:27,094 --> 00:15:30,639
Well, something tells me you probably
were never half-man, half-horse.
385
00:15:30,722 --> 00:15:31,974
But, hell, what do I know?
386
00:15:32,057 --> 00:15:34,852
All I know is you got a great attitude.
387
00:15:34,935 --> 00:15:37,396
So come on,
you old son of a gun,
388
00:15:37,479 --> 00:15:39,898
and let buster do a line
off your boner.
389
00:15:45,320 --> 00:15:46,405
No.
390
00:15:52,077 --> 00:15:54,454
Uh, garzon, why don't
you hook up the young lady here
391
00:15:54,538 --> 00:15:57,040
with one of your
best strawberry daiquiris?
392
00:15:58,041 --> 00:16:00,961
All righty. Thanks.
393
00:16:01,044 --> 00:16:03,797
Hey, how's it going, man?
Uh, did you sell any of your pills?
394
00:16:03,881 --> 00:16:06,383
Uh, no. Actually, I'm kind of working
a different angle here, Charlie.
395
00:16:06,592 --> 00:16:08,302
- I sold all of mine.
- Okay, that's…
396
00:16:08,385 --> 00:16:11,054
Lawn jockeys are crazy people, man.
Did you know that?
397
00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:12,973
Charlie, you're kinda
cramping my style.
398
00:16:13,056 --> 00:16:14,183
I'm trying to drum up
a little business here.
399
00:16:14,308 --> 00:16:15,309
You know what I'm saying?
400
00:16:15,434 --> 00:16:18,604
- Do you know what I'm saying?
- I think I was a centaur in my past life.
401
00:16:18,770 --> 00:16:19,980
It totally occurred to me.
402
00:16:20,063 --> 00:16:21,773
What makes you think
you were half-man, half-horse?
403
00:16:22,024 --> 00:16:24,818
Charlie. Come on.
Out, out. He's working.
404
00:16:24,902 --> 00:16:26,445
- I'm enjoying a roll.
- He's working.
405
00:16:26,653 --> 00:16:28,405
Bro, will you please get out of here?
You smell like cheese.
406
00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:30,449
No, no. It's horse shit.
407
00:16:30,532 --> 00:16:32,201
Well, whatever it is,
it's terrible. Okay? So…
408
00:16:32,284 --> 00:16:33,660
Let's call it what it is.
It's horse shit.
409
00:16:33,785 --> 00:16:36,288
I have it all over my hands.
But it's not cheese.
410
00:16:36,371 --> 00:16:37,873
The horse was eating
a lot of cheese then.
411
00:16:37,956 --> 00:16:38,999
I don't know what it is.
Just you stink.
412
00:16:39,124 --> 00:16:40,918
- Come on. Get up. Get up.
- I don't wanna get up.
413
00:16:41,001 --> 00:16:42,878
As a matter of fact,
you really don't smell that much better.
414
00:16:42,961 --> 00:16:44,379
If you could get
out of here, that'd be really helpful.
415
00:16:44,463 --> 00:16:45,547
Don't talk to me that way, Dennis.
416
00:16:45,631 --> 00:16:48,175
Don't talk to me.
I am your pimp. You are my ho.
417
00:16:48,258 --> 00:16:49,259
Look, dude.
418
00:16:49,718 --> 00:16:52,179
- Horses don't eat cheese.
- You are ruining this!
419
00:16:52,262 --> 00:16:55,307
Will you get out of here,
for the love of all that is holy on Earth!
420
00:16:55,390 --> 00:16:57,476
- You reek of cheese!
- Excuse me.
421
00:16:57,893 --> 00:16:59,228
Are you
the Reynolds party?
422
00:16:59,394 --> 00:17:00,562
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
423
00:17:00,646 --> 00:17:02,689
We had to escort
your friends off the property.
424
00:17:02,773 --> 00:17:05,442
- They're waiting for you by your car.
- Oh…
425
00:17:06,276 --> 00:17:09,488
Yeah. Where?
Ah, the guilty parties.
426
00:17:09,738 --> 00:17:12,115
Yeah. Yeah, Mac made a whole
series of bad decisions.
427
00:17:12,199 --> 00:17:13,992
And then we got kicked out,
and they stole our drugs.
428
00:17:14,076 --> 00:17:15,827
- Was he being bossy?
- Yeah. He was being very bossy.
429
00:17:15,911 --> 00:17:16,954
And now we've got nothing.
430
00:17:17,037 --> 00:17:18,956
- It's not a total loss, all right?
- No, no, no.
431
00:17:19,039 --> 00:17:20,082
I sold all my pills.
432
00:17:20,332 --> 00:17:22,709
- Oh! Nice.
- Oh, that's awesome.
433
00:17:22,793 --> 00:17:25,546
- What about you, Dennis?
- Dennis is a prostitute now.
434
00:17:25,629 --> 00:17:27,631
- Good.
- No, I'm not a prostitute, okay?
435
00:17:27,714 --> 00:17:29,675
- Yes, he is.
- There's no banging old ladies and dudes.
436
00:17:29,758 --> 00:17:32,344
All right? I will be providing
a very important service, however,
437
00:17:32,427 --> 00:17:35,305
as what I would like to be
called a handsome companion.
438
00:17:35,556 --> 00:17:37,099
- To dudes?
- To guys or…
439
00:17:37,307 --> 00:17:38,934
No, not to dudes.
No, hang on.
440
00:17:39,017 --> 00:17:41,770
Hold on. Hang on.
To old, fancy, rich ladies
441
00:17:41,854 --> 00:17:44,147
who want to do classy, exotic,
fancy things with me.
442
00:17:44,439 --> 00:17:46,316
Great. Dennis,
you keep banging dudes.
443
00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:49,403
Dee, let's take
Charlie's money and go buy some cocaine.
444
00:17:49,570 --> 00:17:51,989
Do you see what you're
doing here with the bossiness again?
445
00:17:52,072 --> 00:17:54,157
- And the demanding? I don't appreciate it.
- Ordering everyone around.
446
00:17:54,241 --> 00:17:55,951
- You're out, dude!
- Oh, he's out.
447
00:17:56,034 --> 00:17:57,661
You're not kicking me out.
I'm the boss of you!
448
00:17:57,744 --> 00:17:59,663
You're the only one who hasn't made
any forward progress today.
449
00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:00,747
Just hang back.
450
00:18:00,873 --> 00:18:02,916
Wait. I'm supposed to put
my life into your hands?
451
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:05,586
- Leave your ego out of it.
- Look, we're in some…
452
00:18:05,669 --> 00:18:08,422
Excuse me! We're in some
serious hot water here
453
00:18:08,505 --> 00:18:10,465
because of you and your bossiness.
454
00:18:10,549 --> 00:18:12,843
- You should stop acting like a baby.
- Go on.
455
00:18:12,968 --> 00:18:13,969
So you're gonna leave me here?
456
00:18:14,178 --> 00:18:18,432
We cannot have you around us
screwing things up!
457
00:18:18,515 --> 00:18:20,017
How am I supposed to get home?
458
00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:22,644
You're supposed to walk
like the rest of the Americans.
459
00:18:22,769 --> 00:18:24,229
- You walk, you know?
- On their two feet!
460
00:18:24,313 --> 00:18:26,148
Walk? It's like 40 miles!
461
00:18:26,273 --> 00:18:28,734
Oh, that's why young people…
462
00:18:28,817 --> 00:18:32,112
You can't do this to me!
You can't do this!
463
00:18:32,196 --> 00:18:34,823
I'm smart,
and I deserve respect!
464
00:18:34,948 --> 00:18:36,950
I'm gonna get you
sons of bitches!
465
00:18:40,913 --> 00:18:42,289
- Whoa!
- You want to stop it already?
466
00:18:44,416 --> 00:18:47,461
It's okay. I put the parking brake on.
Sorry about that, boys.
467
00:18:47,544 --> 00:18:48,670
Hey, you got our money?
468
00:18:49,171 --> 00:18:50,756
No. No, I do not have your money.
469
00:18:50,839 --> 00:18:52,633
But I think there's been
a misunderstanding here.
470
00:18:52,716 --> 00:18:54,760
- And I wanna set it straight.
- Proceed.
471
00:18:54,885 --> 00:18:57,596
Well, ever since your alleged "package"
472
00:18:57,679 --> 00:19:00,140
came into my bar,
I may or may not
473
00:19:00,224 --> 00:19:02,059
have had absolutely nothing to do with it.
474
00:19:02,392 --> 00:19:04,019
- You did or you didn't?
- I did.
475
00:19:04,228 --> 00:19:05,479
You did have something to do with it?
476
00:19:05,687 --> 00:19:08,690
No. No. I did have absolutely
nothing to do with it.
477
00:19:08,774 --> 00:19:12,444
Wait, wait. You just said
you did have something to do with it.
478
00:19:12,528 --> 00:19:15,531
I think I said I did have
absolutely nothing to do with it.
479
00:19:15,739 --> 00:19:16,907
- But you said…
- Are you sure?
480
00:19:17,032 --> 00:19:18,659
The thing is when you
use a double negative,
481
00:19:18,742 --> 00:19:19,910
it becomes something completely different.
482
00:19:19,993 --> 00:19:22,538
But you know, we can get into that later.
The point is this, guys.
483
00:19:22,621 --> 00:19:25,040
I want to get in on what you guys got.
484
00:19:25,123 --> 00:19:26,834
I want to dress like a track star.
485
00:19:26,917 --> 00:19:28,752
I want to wear gold shit
and slick my hair back
486
00:19:28,836 --> 00:19:30,754
and grow a pompadour,
you know?
487
00:19:31,046 --> 00:19:33,340
- You want to join our crew, huh?
- More than anything.
488
00:19:33,507 --> 00:19:35,217
Okay, first things first.
489
00:19:35,300 --> 00:19:36,760
You gotta prove your loyalty.
490
00:19:37,052 --> 00:19:38,303
- Prove my loyalty?
- Yeah.
491
00:19:38,595 --> 00:19:40,305
I want you
492
00:19:40,389 --> 00:19:42,224
- to go clean the bathrooms.
- Yeah.
493
00:19:42,432 --> 00:19:44,142
- The bathrooms?
- Yeah. The bathrooms.
494
00:19:45,060 --> 00:19:46,645
- Why?
- 'Cause that's the first step
495
00:19:46,728 --> 00:19:48,272
in becoming a part of our crew!
496
00:19:48,480 --> 00:19:50,983
Okay. Guys, I clean a mean bathroom.
497
00:19:51,066 --> 00:19:52,609
I learned from one of
my friends, Charlie.
498
00:19:52,693 --> 00:19:54,570
You'll get to know him too maybe.
I'll bring him in.
499
00:19:54,653 --> 00:19:57,114
Okay. Thank you.
500
00:19:57,197 --> 00:19:58,699
- Go ahead.
- Thank you.
501
00:19:59,074 --> 00:20:00,659
You gonna really let him
be part of our crew?
502
00:20:01,159 --> 00:20:03,287
Hey, summer squash for brains,
503
00:20:03,370 --> 00:20:05,038
I'm gonna make him our bitch till Friday.
504
00:20:05,289 --> 00:20:06,999
- Oh, bitch boy.
- Bitch boy.
505
00:20:07,082 --> 00:20:08,166
And after that?
506
00:20:09,376 --> 00:20:11,128
I wanna whack him off, irregardless.