1
00:00:02,669 --> 00:00:04,671
<i>So Dee's bringing
another boyfriend?</i>

2
00:00:04,755 --> 00:00:07,424
<i>She won't shut up
about this one. He's a local rapper.</i>

3
00:00:07,508 --> 00:00:09,676
- He's like some hotshot rapper.
- What's his name?

4
00:00:10,093 --> 00:00:12,930
- Lil' Jeff. Lil' Joe.
- It's was, like, Jonathan, little Michael.

5
00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:14,598
- L'il Kev?
- Little… L'il Kev.

6
00:00:14,681 --> 00:00:16,808
Shit. I've heard about him.
He's a local celebrity.

7
00:00:16,892 --> 00:00:18,644
- He's supposed to be the next Eminem.
- What is he?

8
00:00:18,727 --> 00:00:20,812
- Like a small guy or little guy?
- No, probably not.

9
00:00:20,896 --> 00:00:22,147
I think it's just a rapper thing.

10
00:00:22,231 --> 00:00:23,273
- Lil' Kim.
- Yeah, it's like…

11
00:00:23,357 --> 00:00:24,942
You never know though.
He could have, like,

12
00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:27,569
a little hand or a little foot
or something.

13
00:00:27,653 --> 00:00:30,072
I doubt he'd want to call attention
to that by calling himself L'il Kev.

14
00:00:30,155 --> 00:00:32,074
That could be his thing.
Biggie Smalls was fat.

15
00:00:32,157 --> 00:00:35,202
- Yeah. He was big and small. And, like…
- Right.

16
00:00:35,285 --> 00:00:37,371
I guess his head was small,
but his body was big.

17
00:00:37,454 --> 00:00:39,748
So this guy could have
a little hand and a giant body.

18
00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:42,459
What's up, hos?
I'd like you to meet somebody.

19
00:00:42,543 --> 00:00:44,920
Kevin, these are the clowns
I work with.

20
00:00:45,003 --> 00:00:46,922
- Oh, this your crew, baby?
- Mmm-hmm.

21
00:00:47,005 --> 00:00:50,300
Girl, you silly.
They ain't no clowns. What up, fellas?

22
00:00:50,384 --> 00:00:53,136
- What's up, man?
- Hey, man. How's it going?

23
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:55,097
I gots to get back to the studio,
but I'll holler

24
00:00:55,180 --> 00:00:56,223
at you later, okay, pooh bear?

25
00:00:57,558 --> 00:00:58,725
Yo, later, fellas.

26
00:00:58,976 --> 00:01:00,644
- See ya, man.
- Yeah.

27
00:01:00,727 --> 00:01:03,689
Boom. Yep, you're seein' it.

28
00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:07,359
Hey, Dee, does that guy have, like,
a little hand?

29
00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:09,653
Charlie, I was gonna say
his foot looks small.

30
00:01:09,736 --> 00:01:11,405
Nah. Well, dude,
it's possible.

31
00:01:11,488 --> 00:01:13,907
The shoes were the
same size, but his hand was like…

32
00:01:14,199 --> 00:01:16,118
He doesn't have a little hand
or a little foot.

33
00:01:16,326 --> 00:01:18,245
- Wait. Did that guy go to Waldron?
- I don't know.

34
00:01:18,328 --> 00:01:19,663
- Is his name Kevin Gallagher?
- Yes.

35
00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:22,708
- Holy shit. No, that guy's retarded.
- Well, you're retarded.

36
00:01:22,791 --> 00:01:23,834
No, Dee, that's not what I'm saying.

37
00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:25,711
I'm saying he is
an actual retarded person.

38
00:01:25,794 --> 00:01:27,212
We went to elementary school together.

39
00:01:27,296 --> 00:01:29,256
He used to take classes
in a trailer outside school.

40
00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:30,424
He rode the short bus.

41
00:01:30,507 --> 00:01:33,719
Whatever. You think I wouldn't know
if the guy I'm dating is retarded?

42
00:01:36,930 --> 00:01:39,933
There is no way
I am dating a retarded person.

43
00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:18,472
But he's so tough
and popular and famous.

44
00:02:18,597 --> 00:02:20,307
I mean, he's a successful musician.

45
00:02:20,432 --> 00:02:23,769
Jesus, sweetie.
The guy might be retarded.

46
00:02:23,852 --> 00:02:27,773
Yeah, but he might not be.
Plus, he gives me things.

47
00:02:27,856 --> 00:02:30,192
Did you guys see this necklace?
It's got diamonds in it.

48
00:02:30,275 --> 00:02:32,194
I gotta think about this.

49
00:02:32,361 --> 00:02:34,988
Come take a look at my elementary school
yearbook sometime, Dee.

50
00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:36,698
Uh, guys, I'm getting an idea.

51
00:02:36,782 --> 00:02:39,159
- Charlie, follow me on this one for a sec.
- Okay.

52
00:02:39,243 --> 00:02:42,412
Retarded or not… I mean, clearly there's
something off about that guy.

53
00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:44,206
That guy's very messed up.

54
00:02:44,289 --> 00:02:47,042
- Yeah. No, I'm saying he's retarded.
- Yeah, whatever.

55
00:02:47,125 --> 00:02:49,086
But he's an up-and-coming musician.
I mean, he's, like,

56
00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:51,171
really building a following
in this city.

57
00:02:51,255 --> 00:02:53,423
- He's like the next Eminem.
- Right he's supposed to be big.

58
00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:56,927
Okay. So, if he can do it, why can't we?

59
00:02:57,302 --> 00:02:59,263
I can't argue that logic, man.
What are you suggesting?

60
00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:00,764
I'm thinking we start a band.

61
00:03:00,848 --> 00:03:03,058
Holy shit. Yeah!

62
00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:04,726
Yeah?

63
00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:06,854
- We're in a band!
- Yeah! Let's do it!

64
00:03:06,937 --> 00:03:09,231
- I've always wanted to be a rock god.
- Ooh! Ooh, ooh.

65
00:03:09,356 --> 00:03:11,692
- Why are you "ooh, ooh-ing" me?
- You're not in it.

66
00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:14,778
Why am I not in it?
I have a great voice.

67
00:03:14,862 --> 00:03:17,072
You do have a great voice. You know what,
man? You have an excellent voice.

68
00:03:17,155 --> 00:03:19,700
But the problem is you're into all that
early '80s glam rock fem shit,

69
00:03:19,783 --> 00:03:21,785
and it's just not the artistic direction
I wanna take the band in.

70
00:03:21,869 --> 00:03:24,162
Artistic direction?
You guys don't even play instruments.

71
00:03:24,246 --> 00:03:26,248
- Well, no…
- Okay, well, that doesn't matter, does it?

72
00:03:26,331 --> 00:03:28,458
Because it's all about
rocking and looking cool and kicking ass.

73
00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:31,211
Yeah, I think he's right.
It's all about image and marketing.

74
00:03:31,295 --> 00:03:34,131
I mean, there's no bands out there
with any musical ability.

75
00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:36,466
Frank, I like the way
you think. You're in the band.

76
00:03:40,012 --> 00:03:42,264
Wow. Dude,
don't overreact about it, man.

77
00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:45,058
Frank, get out that checkbook.
You're gonna buy us some instruments.

78
00:03:47,436 --> 00:03:48,770
Yeah, brother.
That's a hot guitar.

79
00:03:48,854 --> 00:03:52,774
You got, uh, graphite reinforced neck,
35-inch scale, two hum buckers.

80
00:03:52,858 --> 00:03:54,610
Yeah, guy, move over six inches.

81
00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:56,403
Oh, yeah.

82
00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:59,072
- Um, yeah, so I was saying…
- Yeah, that's it. Shut up.

83
00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:01,742
Soak it in.

84
00:04:01,950 --> 00:04:04,953
- So, uh, graphite reinforced neck…
- Boom. Yeah.

85
00:04:05,037 --> 00:04:08,457
- 35-inch scale…
- Shh. That's the one.

86
00:04:18,550 --> 00:04:21,970
- Check this thing out. It's like a weapon.
- Cool, bro.

87
00:04:22,054 --> 00:04:24,431
Holy shit. Where did you learn
how to play like that?

88
00:04:24,556 --> 00:04:28,685
Oh, man, keyboards just make sense
to me, man. I get 'em, you know?

89
00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:31,939
Charlie, you're amazing. Hey, man,
you're gonna be our ace in the hole.

90
00:04:32,314 --> 00:04:34,691
You know what though?
Can I talk to you for a second about this?

91
00:04:34,858 --> 00:04:36,485
- Sure.
- Any way that I can be

92
00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:37,653
in the back of the stage…

93
00:04:37,736 --> 00:04:40,072
- Or, like, behind some kind of curtain?
- Why?

94
00:04:40,405 --> 00:04:42,908
- Can I bare my soul to you for a second?
- Of course, buddy.

95
00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:45,953
This is huge for me.
I've always wanted to do this.

96
00:04:46,036 --> 00:04:48,205
It's, like, this is a big deal.
I've just always been afraid

97
00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:50,290
that people are gonna boo me
or they're gonna hate me.

98
00:04:50,374 --> 00:04:52,751
It's why I've never
pursued my dreams, man.

99
00:04:53,001 --> 00:04:54,586
So, I mean, if that happens,

100
00:04:54,670 --> 00:04:56,296
it's gonna crush me,
I'm gonna crumble,

101
00:04:56,380 --> 00:04:57,548
I'm gonna fall to pieces,
I'm gonna scream.

102
00:04:57,631 --> 00:04:59,299
You're not listening
to what I'm saying, are you?

103
00:04:59,383 --> 00:05:02,344
Totally. Dude, I think we should do, like,
a Sex Pistols thing, right?

104
00:05:02,427 --> 00:05:04,847
Where I'm Sid Vicious
and you're Johnny Rotten.

105
00:05:04,930 --> 00:05:06,723
No, no. I'm Simon
and you're Garfunkel, if anything.

106
00:05:06,932 --> 00:05:08,183
You're Axl, I'm Slash.

107
00:05:08,267 --> 00:05:11,144
No. I'm "Holland" Oates.
You're, like, Peter Gabriel.

108
00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:13,272
Hall & Oates is two separate people.

109
00:05:13,564 --> 00:05:16,942
No, "Holland" is his first name
and Oates is his last name, dude.

110
00:05:17,025 --> 00:05:19,444
Whatever, dude.
I just wanna kick ass.

111
00:05:19,528 --> 00:05:21,572
- Hey. You with that bald guy?
- Yeah.

112
00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:23,949
Yeah, well, get him out of here,
or I'm calling the cops.

113
00:05:36,128 --> 00:05:37,546
I'm taking these.

114
00:05:38,797 --> 00:05:42,301
There he is. Good old Special K.
He is drooling on himself.

115
00:05:42,384 --> 00:05:44,428
Well, so what?
He's, like, seven in this yearbook.

116
00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:46,722
Okay, if I'm gonna
break up with this guy, I need some proof.

117
00:05:46,805 --> 00:05:49,474
Well, look, Dee, you're free
to date whoever you want, okay?

118
00:05:49,558 --> 00:05:52,477
I just think you should know whether
or not you're gold-digging a retarded guy.

119
00:05:52,561 --> 00:05:56,690
Okay, number one, I'm not gold-digging
anybody, okay? I really like this guy.

120
00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:58,358
Second of all,
this doesn't prove that he's retarded.

121
00:05:58,442 --> 00:05:59,484
You want proof?

122
00:05:59,568 --> 00:06:01,361
- I want proof.
- When are you seeing him next?

123
00:06:01,445 --> 00:06:04,156
- I'm picking him up in, like, an hour.
- You're picking him up?

124
00:06:04,448 --> 00:06:06,533
- He doesn't drive.
- Ooh. Uh, that's funny,

125
00:06:06,617 --> 00:06:08,869
'cause people
who aren't retarded usually drive.

126
00:06:08,952 --> 00:06:11,038
Retarded one.
Normal zero.

127
00:06:15,459 --> 00:06:19,338
Not bad, Dennis. Nice neighborhood.
Owns his own house. Three stories.

128
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:22,174
Looks like it's retarded one, normal one.

129
00:06:22,674 --> 00:06:24,092
Yes?

130
00:06:24,218 --> 00:06:26,553
Oh, hi. I think we have the wrong address.

131
00:06:26,637 --> 00:06:28,805
- Are you Dee?
- Yeah. Who are you?

132
00:06:28,889 --> 00:06:31,141
I'm Kevin's mom.
Come on in.

133
00:06:32,142 --> 00:06:34,645
Oh, lives with his mom.
I think I'll be taking that point back.

134
00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:37,898
Kevin's in his room.
Go on up if you like.

135
00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:40,234
Oh, thank you, Mrs. Gallagher.
You must be very,

136
00:06:40,317 --> 00:06:41,652
very proud of your son.

137
00:06:41,735 --> 00:06:44,112
I mean, he has overcome
some pretty difficult odds.

138
00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:45,447
Yes, he has.

139
00:06:45,531 --> 00:06:46,907
- Well, you're talking about the rapping.
- Excuse me?

140
00:06:46,990 --> 00:06:49,159
Those odds you refer to,
you're talking about his rapping career.

141
00:06:49,368 --> 00:06:50,786
- I guess.
- Mrs. Gallagher,

142
00:06:50,953 --> 00:06:53,205
would you describe your son
as a special guy?

143
00:06:53,330 --> 00:06:54,998
- No, you can't do that.
- Why can't I do that? What's wrong…

144
00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:56,542
Because he's her son.
Of course he's special.

145
00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:59,086
That's an easy yes.
You think he's special, right?

146
00:06:59,253 --> 00:07:00,671
- Yes.
- Yeah, that means nothing to me.

147
00:07:00,754 --> 00:07:02,965
That means a whole lot.
Retarded three, normal zero.

148
00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:11,348
Hold on. Hang on. How come
you got that point? That was my point.

149
00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:12,432
- What…
- That was my point.

150
00:07:12,516 --> 00:07:14,101
- Retarded two, normal one.
- She practically came out

151
00:07:14,184 --> 00:07:16,395
and told us he was retarded.
Retarded four, normal zero.

152
00:07:16,478 --> 00:07:18,605
Whoa! Hold on a second.
Where'd four come from?

153
00:07:18,689 --> 00:07:19,815
It's definitely not four.

154
00:07:19,898 --> 00:07:21,733
Let's see. There's the driving,
the drooling in the yearbook,

155
00:07:21,817 --> 00:07:24,403
the overcoming the odds, the living
with the mom and now the special thing.

156
00:07:24,486 --> 00:07:25,821
- You know what? It's not four. It's five.
- Oh, yeah?

157
00:07:25,904 --> 00:07:28,031
Are you the point king?
You pick up points left and right?

158
00:07:28,115 --> 00:07:29,449
It's retarded three, normal one.

159
00:07:29,533 --> 00:07:31,827
Oh, come on. There's so much more
retarded stuff that…

160
00:07:34,580 --> 00:07:35,789
What's up?

161
00:07:36,081 --> 00:07:38,834
- Hey!
- Oh, you brought your crew, baby.

162
00:07:38,917 --> 00:07:41,336
This is my brother Dennis,
he's gonna give us a ride.

163
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:43,755
- Oh, snap! What up, son?
- Hey.

164
00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:45,465
I didn't know
we were doing all that.

165
00:07:45,591 --> 00:07:47,968
Yo, I gotta grab a couple of things.
Be ready to riz-zoll.

166
00:07:49,428 --> 00:07:51,513
Man, that's retard strength
if I've ever seen it.

167
00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:53,682
- You know what I mean?
- Shut your mouth.

168
00:08:03,317 --> 00:08:04,359
Go!

169
00:08:04,526 --> 00:08:05,611
Go! Go!

170
00:08:05,861 --> 00:08:08,614
All right, stop! Stop!
Why are you not singing?

171
00:08:08,864 --> 00:08:12,034
Well, uh, it doesn't
sound very good.

172
00:08:12,242 --> 00:08:15,037
- Well, huff some glue, bro.
- I've been huffing glue, guys.

173
00:08:15,162 --> 00:08:16,830
- Then growl into the microphone, Charlie.
- No. This is…

174
00:08:16,914 --> 00:08:18,957
I don't even wanna growl.
I'm not a growler.

175
00:08:19,041 --> 00:08:22,211
- Band meeting! Band meeting!
- Yeah, band meeting! We need one!

176
00:08:22,461 --> 00:08:25,923
Hold on a minute!
We're sittin' around here practicin'

177
00:08:26,006 --> 00:08:27,633
like a bunch of pansies!

178
00:08:27,883 --> 00:08:30,427
We should be out
gettin' wasted and breakin' shit!

179
00:08:30,511 --> 00:08:32,679
Frank's absolutely right.
How can we be rock stars

180
00:08:32,763 --> 00:08:34,765
if we're not living like rock stars?

181
00:08:34,848 --> 00:08:36,975
If we live like rock stars,
the music will come!

182
00:08:37,059 --> 00:08:38,310
- Okay. Okay. Okay.
- The music will come, Charlie!

183
00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:41,104
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Stop, dude!

184
00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:44,566
- What are you doing? That's my good chair.
- That's your good chair?

185
00:08:44,650 --> 00:08:47,027
- Yeah.
- It's covered in bird shit.

186
00:08:47,444 --> 00:08:50,405
No. That's toothpaste, man.

187
00:08:50,489 --> 00:08:52,866
- That's clearly bird shit.
- No, it's not. It's toothpaste.

188
00:08:52,950 --> 00:08:55,369
- Do you even own a toothbrush?
- I, uh…

189
00:08:58,956 --> 00:09:00,666
- Look, don't break my chair.
- Oh, my God!

190
00:09:00,749 --> 00:09:03,794
- No!
- Wait! Wait a minute. Charlie is right.

191
00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:06,505
We should not be breaking
our own shit.

192
00:09:06,588 --> 00:09:09,174
We should be out there
breaking other people's shit.

193
00:09:09,258 --> 00:09:10,676
That's rock and roll.

194
00:09:12,386 --> 00:09:14,680
Yeah!
That's what I'm talking about!

195
00:09:14,763 --> 00:09:16,765
You feeling better, Charlie?

196
00:09:16,849 --> 00:09:18,559
Yeah! Whoo!

197
00:09:19,184 --> 00:09:22,771
Keep smashing things, guys!
It's a ripple effect!

198
00:09:22,855 --> 00:09:26,525
Hey, how'd you guys get a hotel room
without putting a credit card down?

199
00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:29,152
We did use a credit card, man.
I took it out of your wallet.

200
00:09:29,403 --> 00:09:30,696
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

201
00:09:30,779 --> 00:09:34,199
- My credit card number's down at the desk?
- Yeah.

202
00:09:34,283 --> 00:09:38,495
You mean we're smashing up a hotel room
with my credit card down at the desk?

203
00:09:38,579 --> 00:09:40,330
Why would you do that?

204
00:09:40,622 --> 00:09:43,375
Uh, they don't let you book a hotel room
without putting down a credit card, Frank.

205
00:09:43,458 --> 00:09:46,503
What year do you think it is?

206
00:09:46,712 --> 00:09:48,422
We gotta put this stuff back
together again.

207
00:09:48,589 --> 00:09:52,050
- Get the glue. Charlie, you gotta get it.
- What? Glue is for huffing, dude.

208
00:09:52,134 --> 00:09:55,262
- Get me the glue! Get me the glue!
- It's a part of his process.

209
00:09:55,596 --> 00:09:58,140
This is not rock and roll!

210
00:10:08,025 --> 00:10:11,195
Oh, this shit is funny!
You like this movie?

211
00:10:11,612 --> 00:10:14,281
- Your shirt's on backwards.
- What?

212
00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:16,617
Oh, snap! It is.

213
00:10:16,992 --> 00:10:20,412
Oh, look!

214
00:10:39,264 --> 00:10:40,557
We need to break up.

215
00:10:53,403 --> 00:10:55,197
Hey. Where's your suit?

216
00:10:55,781 --> 00:10:57,115
I'm not wearing the suit, Frank,

217
00:10:57,199 --> 00:10:59,034
because it's lame
and you look like a pussy.

218
00:10:59,159 --> 00:11:03,080
That, that defeats the whole purpose.
I mean, the idea is to trick the moms

219
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:05,415
into letting the kids bop with us.

220
00:11:05,749 --> 00:11:08,377
It's not the '50s anymore,
Frank. The kids aren't bopping anymore.

221
00:11:08,502 --> 00:11:11,004
They're banging each other and doing meth
before they hit grade school.

222
00:11:11,463 --> 00:11:14,383
- Can I at least pick the name of the band?
- What do you got?

223
00:11:15,217 --> 00:11:17,135
The Pecan Sandies.

224
00:11:18,136 --> 00:11:20,138
- Isn't that a cookie?
- Yeah, it's a cookie,

225
00:11:20,222 --> 00:11:21,473
but it's got another meaning.

226
00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:23,267
- What's the other meaning?
- What?

227
00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:25,310
Other than a cookie,
what's the other meaning?

228
00:11:25,435 --> 00:11:28,188
It's a, you know it's a…
It's a sexual meaning.

229
00:11:28,313 --> 00:11:31,066
No, we are not the Pecan Sandies,
all right? We are Chemical Toilet.

230
00:11:31,149 --> 00:11:33,151
Because chicks want guys
that wear tight pants

231
00:11:33,235 --> 00:11:34,820
and tattered clothing and spit blood.

232
00:11:34,903 --> 00:11:37,739
Not guys dressed like waiters
who name themselves after desserts.

233
00:11:37,823 --> 00:11:40,284
- We are Chemical Toilet. Charlie!
- Porta-potty.

234
00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:41,535
How's that song coming?

235
00:11:41,618 --> 00:11:43,453
Yeah,
I'll be out in a second, all right?

236
00:11:43,537 --> 00:11:45,747
And, Frank, who the hell is this guy?

237
00:11:45,914 --> 00:11:48,667
That's Ernie. He works for beer.
He looks a little tangled up.

238
00:11:48,876 --> 00:11:51,253
Does he know anything about hooking up
that electrical equipment?

239
00:11:51,378 --> 00:11:54,006
- No.
- Okay, okay. I'm ready to rock.

240
00:11:54,089 --> 00:11:56,341
- And who are you supposed to be?
- Bob Dylan, man.

241
00:11:56,425 --> 00:11:58,343
- Jesus Christ. We are all over the place.
- Check this out.

242
00:11:58,427 --> 00:12:00,053
Is this a page
from a coloring book?

243
00:12:00,137 --> 00:12:02,306
No, dude. That's <i>Night Man.</i>
Those are lyrics.

244
00:12:03,098 --> 00:12:04,725
- Whatever. Let's just rock.
<i>- Night Man,</i> baby.

245
00:12:04,850 --> 00:12:06,518
- Okay, this is what I'm talking about.
- Let's rock and roll!

246
00:12:06,602 --> 00:12:08,353
- Yee-ha!
- All right.

247
00:12:08,437 --> 00:12:09,521
Where's my curtain?

248
00:12:09,688 --> 00:12:10,981
You won't need a curtain.

249
00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:12,858
- I want a curtain blocking my face.
- You don't need it.

250
00:12:12,941 --> 00:12:14,860
- Go on. Go have a beer, Ernie.
- Okay.

251
00:12:14,985 --> 00:12:16,904
All right. Ready?

252
00:12:17,279 --> 00:12:19,156
Five, six, seven, eight.

253
00:12:19,239 --> 00:12:21,867
<i>Night man sneaky and mean</i>

254
00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:24,578
<i>Spider inside my dreams
I think I love you</i>

255
00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:27,331
<i>You make me wanna cry
You make me wanna die</i>

256
00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:31,585
<i>I love you, I love you, I love you
I love you I love you, Night Man</i>

257
00:12:32,211 --> 00:12:34,755
<i>Every night
you come into my room and pin me down</i>

258
00:12:34,838 --> 00:12:37,508
<i>With your strong arms
you pin me down</i>

259
00:12:37,591 --> 00:12:40,719
<i>And I try to fight you
you come inside me you fill me up</i>

260
00:12:40,802 --> 00:12:43,013
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

261
00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:45,307
- Charlie, Charlie.
- Whoa, Charlie, hold on a second.

262
00:12:45,390 --> 00:12:48,185
First half of that song was kind of cool,
but what's with the second half?

263
00:12:48,310 --> 00:12:51,480
It's about the Night Man,
like, filling me up, and I become him.

264
00:12:51,563 --> 00:12:52,856
I become the spirit of the Night Man.

265
00:12:52,940 --> 00:12:55,275
It sounds like a song where a man
breaks into your house and rapes you.

266
00:12:55,359 --> 00:12:57,819
What, dude? Where are you
getting that from? All right. No.

267
00:12:57,945 --> 00:13:00,072
<i>It's just two men sharing the night</i>

268
00:13:00,155 --> 00:13:02,491
<i>It might seem wrong
but it's just right</i>

269
00:13:02,574 --> 00:13:04,993
<i>It's just two men sharing each other</i>

270
00:13:05,077 --> 00:13:07,621
<i>It's just two men like lovin' brothers</i>

271
00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:10,123
<i>One on top and one on bottom</i>

272
00:13:10,207 --> 00:13:12,543
<i>One inside and one is out</i>

273
00:13:12,626 --> 00:13:15,128
<i>One is screamin' he's so happy</i>

274
00:13:15,254 --> 00:13:17,214
<i>The other's screamin' a passionate shout</i>

275
00:13:17,297 --> 00:13:21,468
<i>It's the Night Man they're feeling
so wrong and right, man</i>

276
00:13:21,593 --> 00:13:23,637
<i>They're feeling so wrong
and right, man</i>

277
00:13:23,762 --> 00:13:27,140
<i>I can't fight you, man
when you come inside me</i>

278
00:13:27,224 --> 00:13:29,351
<i>And pin me down
with your strong hands</i>

279
00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:33,480
<i>And I become the night</i>

280
00:13:33,564 --> 00:13:36,066
<i>The passionate, passionate Night Man</i>

281
00:13:36,233 --> 00:13:37,568
We need a new front man.

282
00:13:37,651 --> 00:13:39,027
Right. You want someone with a good voice.

283
00:13:39,111 --> 00:13:40,487
- Yes.
- Who's attractive.

284
00:13:40,571 --> 00:13:42,114
- Yes.
- Someone with charisma.

285
00:13:42,197 --> 00:13:43,532
Yes.

286
00:13:43,615 --> 00:13:45,534
Well, I've got
an awful lot of reading to do.

287
00:13:45,617 --> 00:13:47,744
Do you wanna be
in the band or not, dude?

288
00:13:48,996 --> 00:13:51,081
- Can I wear spandex?
- I'd rather you didn't.

289
00:13:51,748 --> 00:13:53,208
I think I'm gonna wear spandex.

290
00:13:53,750 --> 00:13:55,002
- Are you ready?
- Yeah. Let me see it.

291
00:13:55,127 --> 00:13:57,004
- What if I did something like this? Ready?
- Let me see.

292
00:13:57,129 --> 00:13:59,214
I give a kick,
but then I'm gonna stomp down.

293
00:13:59,298 --> 00:14:00,340
A stomp is good.

294
00:14:00,424 --> 00:14:02,301
You know what mean? Like…

295
00:14:04,386 --> 00:14:07,181
That's good. Every time
I stomp, you do that. That's good.

296
00:14:07,264 --> 00:14:09,516
Oh, man. Really?

297
00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:12,561
Come on, dude.
What's with the sash and the codpiece?

298
00:14:12,644 --> 00:14:14,938
Don't be afraid of
a little sex appeal, Mac.

299
00:14:15,105 --> 00:14:17,816
- You look like a drag queen.
- I look like a rock god.

300
00:14:17,983 --> 00:14:19,610
All right, here's the song.

301
00:14:20,944 --> 00:14:22,821
What the hell is this,
a page from a coloring book?

302
00:14:22,905 --> 00:14:24,406
It's a song that Charlie wrote.
It's called <i>Night Man.</i>

303
00:14:24,615 --> 00:14:26,533
Skip all the raping parts
and get on stage.

304
00:14:26,617 --> 00:14:29,119
- Very well.
- Well, I just broke up with Kevin.

305
00:14:29,203 --> 00:14:32,039
- Dee, we're trying to practice.
- I can't get it out of my head.

306
00:14:32,122 --> 00:14:34,499
I don't know if he's retarded or not,
but I can't stop thinking about it.

307
00:14:34,583 --> 00:14:36,585
Dee, we're trying to
have band practice here.

308
00:14:36,793 --> 00:14:38,879
I was gonna ride this guy to the top.
You know what I mean?

309
00:14:38,962 --> 00:14:40,881
He was gonna put me
in one of his rap videos.

310
00:14:40,964 --> 00:14:42,674
Look, the guy's not retarded, okay?

311
00:14:44,176 --> 00:14:46,720
- What?
- I was just saying that to mess with you.

312
00:14:47,679 --> 00:14:50,098
Why? Why would you
do something like that?

313
00:14:50,182 --> 00:14:52,100
- I thought it'd be funny.
- It's not funny.

314
00:14:52,184 --> 00:14:53,560
It's not funny at all.
This guy's perfect for me,

315
00:14:53,644 --> 00:14:55,729
and you've gone and you've blown it
and you've ruined everything.

316
00:14:56,980 --> 00:14:59,149
You are a bad, bad person.

317
00:15:00,317 --> 00:15:01,360
Ew.

318
00:15:01,652 --> 00:15:03,028
All right. Ready, guys?

319
00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:05,280
So, that guy's not retarded?

320
00:15:05,697 --> 00:15:07,741
Oh, no, he's totally retarded.

321
00:15:07,824 --> 00:15:10,661
- All right, let's rock.
- Five, six, seven, eight.

322
00:15:26,260 --> 00:15:30,430
<i>They took you, Night Man
and you don't belong to them</i>

323
00:15:31,682 --> 00:15:34,726
<i>They locked me
in a world of darkness</i>

324
00:15:34,810 --> 00:15:36,228
<i>Without your sexy hands</i>

325
00:15:36,311 --> 00:15:40,607
<i>And I miss you Night Man, so bad</i>

326
00:15:45,654 --> 00:15:47,698
Stupid, can't write.

327
00:15:48,866 --> 00:15:50,492
- Charlie?
- Oh, oh.

328
00:15:50,576 --> 00:15:52,786
- Let's join forces.
- Hello! Come right in.

329
00:15:52,870 --> 00:15:54,955
- I will.
- What happened to your band?

330
00:15:55,038 --> 00:15:58,250
- Kicked me out.
- Well, it hurts, doesn't it?

331
00:15:58,333 --> 00:16:00,794
Hmm. What's with the, uh, curtains?

332
00:16:00,878 --> 00:16:03,088
I'm living in a world of darkness.

333
00:16:03,630 --> 00:16:06,550
Right. Let's get some light in here.

334
00:16:09,428 --> 00:16:11,930
Whoa. What's with the spray paint, man?

335
00:16:12,097 --> 00:16:14,808
Uh… What's with your outfit, man?

336
00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:16,810
- Why don't we put the curtains back up?
- No, no.

337
00:16:18,103 --> 00:16:20,856
What is going on up here?

338
00:16:21,106 --> 00:16:22,482
I never know, man.

339
00:16:23,942 --> 00:16:26,195
Daylight.

340
00:16:26,278 --> 00:16:27,321
Yeah, I like that.

341
00:16:28,614 --> 00:16:30,199
<i>Day, Day Man</i>

342
00:16:30,282 --> 00:16:31,366
Day Man.

343
00:16:31,450 --> 00:16:34,161
<i>Fighter of the night man</i>

344
00:16:35,704 --> 00:16:37,664
<i>Champion of the</i>

345
00:16:37,748 --> 00:16:39,374
<i>- Sun
- Sun</i>

346
00:16:39,458 --> 00:16:41,585
<i>You're a master of karate</i>

347
00:16:41,668 --> 00:16:44,588
<i>And friendship for everyone</i>

348
00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:45,756
Day Man That's it!

349
00:16:45,839 --> 00:16:48,133
<i>Day Man, ah, ah, ah</i>

350
00:16:48,217 --> 00:16:52,054
<i>- Fighter of the night man
- Ah, ah, ahh</i>

351
00:16:52,179 --> 00:16:55,224
<i>Champion of the sun, ah, ah</i>

352
00:16:55,307 --> 00:16:56,808
- Do you want some?
- No.

353
00:16:56,934 --> 00:17:01,480
<i>You're a master of karate
and friendship for everyone</i>

354
00:17:01,605 --> 00:17:03,941
<i>- Day Man
- Day Man, ah, ah, ah</i>

355
00:17:04,024 --> 00:17:08,695
- Nice. We'll get the…
<i>- Fighter of the night man ah, ah, ah</i>

356
00:17:08,779 --> 00:17:10,906
<i>Champion of the sun</i>

357
00:17:14,868 --> 00:17:18,664
Ladies and gentlemen,
we are Electric Dream Machine.

358
00:17:20,249 --> 00:17:24,211
Prepare to experience sexual magic.

359
00:17:28,465 --> 00:17:30,759
<i>- Day Man
- Ah, ah, ah</i>

360
00:17:30,843 --> 00:17:35,222
<i>- Fighter of the night man
- Ah, ah, ah</i>

361
00:17:35,389 --> 00:17:38,225
<i>- Champion of the sun</i>
- MAN: Gay!

362
00:17:38,475 --> 00:17:41,228
<i>Ah, ah, ah
you're a master of karate</i>

363
00:17:41,353 --> 00:17:44,147
<i>And friendship for everyone</i>

364
00:17:44,314 --> 00:17:45,858
- Get off the stage!
- Day Man

365
00:17:45,983 --> 00:17:46,984
- Come on.
- All right, rock it.

366
00:17:47,067 --> 00:17:48,861
<i>Day Man</i>

367
00:17:48,986 --> 00:17:51,113
<i>- Ah, ah, ah</i>
- Come on! Come on!

368
00:17:51,196 --> 00:17:54,908
<i>- Come on. Dance. Of the night man</i>
- Why are you booing?

369
00:18:02,583 --> 00:18:05,043
Screw you guys.
God damn it, Charlie.

370
00:18:05,878 --> 00:18:07,629
I'm so glad we worked out.

371
00:18:07,713 --> 00:18:09,173
I'm sorry I was all wishy-washy before.

372
00:18:10,215 --> 00:18:12,759
Yeah, girl.
You was more mixed-up than a milk shake.

373
00:18:12,843 --> 00:18:15,888
I know. It's my brother's fault though.
You're not gonna believe this.

374
00:18:15,971 --> 00:18:20,142
He tried to convince me
that you were retarded. Uh, what?

375
00:18:20,434 --> 00:18:22,644
- Yo, what? That's bananas, girl.
- I know.

376
00:18:22,895 --> 00:18:25,063
You're not retarded, are you?

377
00:18:28,358 --> 00:18:30,694
All right, Paddy's!
You ready to rock?

378
00:18:34,781 --> 00:18:37,618
Yeah! No? Yeah!

379
00:18:37,951 --> 00:18:41,205
What up, Paddy's? Make some noise!

380
00:18:42,372 --> 00:18:43,498
Get off.

381
00:18:43,749 --> 00:18:45,792
Get off the stage, idiot.
Come on, idiot. Come on. Let's go.

382
00:18:46,460 --> 00:18:48,253
- Come on.
- Okay.

383
00:18:48,670 --> 00:18:51,632
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Bust a little freestyle for you.

384
00:18:52,257 --> 00:18:54,343
This one's for my girl, Dee.
This one's for you, baby.

385
00:18:54,885 --> 00:18:56,345
Word! Yo!

386
00:18:56,553 --> 00:18:58,931
<i>Let me tell y'all a story
'bout a girl I knew</i>

387
00:18:59,014 --> 00:19:01,558
<i>A broke-ass bitch with a gay-ass crew</i>

388
00:19:01,642 --> 00:19:03,936
<i>She said that I was cute
she said that I was funny</i>

389
00:19:04,019 --> 00:19:06,688
<i>But the honey couldn't
stop lookin' at my money</i>

390
00:19:06,813 --> 00:19:09,066
<i>Busted old lady with a flat tiny ass</i>

391
00:19:09,191 --> 00:19:11,652
<i>Her body like a skeleton
in science class</i>

392
00:19:11,902 --> 00:19:14,029
<i>Face beat up
by the school of hard knocks</i>

393
00:19:14,154 --> 00:19:16,156
<i>Hair so fried and bleached by Clorox</i>

394
00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:18,867
<i>It's like she's skinny fat
in all the wrong places</i>

395
00:19:18,992 --> 00:19:20,911
<i>Mothers gotta cover their babies' faces</i>

396
00:19:20,994 --> 00:19:23,288
<i>When she walks by
people think she's Godzilla</i>

397
00:19:23,372 --> 00:19:26,416
<i>Straight out of Compton
no, y'all, straight out of Thriller</i>

398
00:19:26,500 --> 00:19:28,919
<i>Looking like a zombie
Walking like a chicken</i>

399
00:19:29,002 --> 00:19:31,547
<i>Mouth full of shit
that's why her breath be stinkin'</i>

400
00:19:31,630 --> 00:19:34,383
<i>Just one question, Dee
before you take your bow</i>

401
00:19:34,466 --> 00:19:36,969
<i>This gravy train's leavin'
so who's retarded now</i>

402
00:19:41,557 --> 00:19:43,225
Hey. Ladies.

403
00:19:43,308 --> 00:19:44,726
Later, bitch.

404
00:19:47,396 --> 00:19:50,691
- I don't think he's retarded.
- Mmm-mmm.