WEBVTT

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- [Announcer] From West
Hollywood California,

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the only news team that doesn't know

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what's on the teleprompter
before they read it.

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Anyone who laughs or breaks, loses points.

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This is Breaking News.

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- It's crazy that Pokemon was popular

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at the same time Michael
Vick went to prison.

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- Welcome to Breaking News,

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the show where we don't know
what we're about to say,

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and we aren't allowed to laugh.

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I'm Jackie Snags.

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- And I'm Horace Race.

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(laughs)

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- Not even 30 seconds.

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Today we'll cover the biggest

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music festival to hit Virginia.

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- I'm talking to a flirting expert

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- And I have a dirty
little secret to get out.

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But first,

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(laughs)

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Butt first coffee.

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(Horace laughs)

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- That's what that was there for (laughs).

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- Yeah.

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(audience laughs)

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So at this point,

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you would read it.
- Let's turn

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to our festival correspondent in (laughs)

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Ina Badspot, Ina?

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- [Ina] Thanks Horace, I'm
getting a FaceTime from a

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crazy old puppet (laughs)

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- What's she say?

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- Kip Hft Meest (laughs)

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Kip Hft Meest Veelzudifg

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(everyone laughs)

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- [Jackie] Which language is that?

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- [Ina] Uhhhh, Dutch?

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- [Horace] (laughs) Well Ina
let's move on to our top story

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today. Wight County is hosting
the largest religious music

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festival in history

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- [Ina] It's true and I'm
here in Wight Country at the

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Wight Savior Country Music
Fesival. This festival hopes to

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give Virginal Virginians an
opportunity to shake their buns

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for him.

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- [Jackie] Are we gonna
catch you riding dirty?

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- [Ina] It's safe to say yes

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- [Hoarce] More on the Wight
savior country music festival,

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as it breaks. Now let's back,
back, back it up ahhh to very

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own flirting exepert Fish Tig.

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- [Shelby] My name is Shelby

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(laughter erupts)

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- [Jackie] It just, it doesn't make sense,

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my mistake ribbit

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- [Hoarse] What do you have
to teach us about flirting?

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- [Shellby] Let's hope into
some roleplay. Is this a french

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cuff? I'll give you five dollars

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- [Hoarse] Five dollars? Sold.
It was custom made to my body

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and it's gonna be great
on your body as well.

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- [Shelby] You must have a nice body

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- [Hoarse] It's a fantastic
body. I'm not gonna stand here

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and say you got a bad body

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- [Shelby] Now say
something about the Emmy's

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- [Hoarse] Those button
suspenders I wore to the

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Emmy's.

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- [Shelby] So that's what not to do.

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(laughs)

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- [Hoarse] That is verbatim
how I flirted with a guy

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at the flea market, where I
sold all my earthly possessions.

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- [Jackie] Well we all had fun,
but one of us really stirred

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the pooch. Congrats to our
least valuable player, Grant.

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- [Shelby] Stirred the pooch, ouch

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- [Jackie] I mean, I didn't write it.

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- [Hoarse] Actually if you go
back and you watch the scene,

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there was vibe, okay? So,
that was good flirting

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- [Ina] So you were like,
looking at the tapes like,

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there was vibe.

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- [Shelby] Yeah, you were like
a coach of football player

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- [Jackie] Breathe back

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(laughs)

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- [Ina] What is it, Monday night

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- [Jackie] Football?

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- [Hoarse] Football?

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(Jackie and Hoarse laugh)

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- [Ina] No um, what's it
Sunday, Tuesday night, um, yeah

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it's your Monday morning
quarterbacking your flirting

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(sighs)

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- [Jackie] What the f*** is going on

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(laughs)