WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.150 --> 00:00:02.490 - [Announcer] From West Hollywood, California, 2 00:00:02.490 --> 00:00:04.300 the only news team that doesn't know 3 00:00:04.300 --> 00:00:07.010 what's on the teleprompter before they read it. 4 00:00:07.010 --> 00:00:10.040 Anyone who laughs or breaks, loses points. 5 00:00:10.040 --> 00:00:12.280 This is Breaking News. 6 00:00:12.280 --> 00:00:14.620 (dramatic music) 7 00:00:14.620 --> 00:00:16.280 - Welcome to Breaking News, 8 00:00:16.280 --> 00:00:19.520 the news show where we don't know what we're about to say 9 00:00:19.520 --> 00:00:22.690 and we aren't allowed to smile or laugh. 10 00:00:22.690 --> 00:00:24.490 I'm Stephanie Meat. 11 00:00:24.490 --> 00:00:27.573 - And I'm Daddy. (laughing) 12 00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:30.310 Tonight, we'll be investigating a slew 13 00:00:30.310 --> 00:00:34.670 of home break ins (laughing) on Maple Lane 14 00:00:34.670 --> 00:00:38.230 and why I smell like piss today. 15 00:00:38.230 --> 00:00:40.800 - It's because I pissed on your suit. 16 00:00:40.800 --> 00:00:45.100 In other news, local eight-year-old Jessica Nodad 17 00:00:45.100 --> 00:00:49.720 won the local Miss Bumblebee Girlboss Pageant. 18 00:00:49.720 --> 00:00:52.440 She now moves on to the state competition 19 00:00:52.440 --> 00:00:56.810 where she will be competing against 12 other little idiots. 20 00:00:56.810 --> 00:01:00.170 - Now, Stephanie, I don't know if you can call them that. 21 00:01:00.170 --> 00:01:03.230 - Sorry, 12 other idiots. 22 00:01:03.230 --> 00:01:04.236 - Thank you. 23 00:01:04.236 --> 00:01:05.580 (Wet laughing) In local sports news, 24 00:01:05.580 --> 00:01:07.810 the Cabin John High School football team 25 00:01:07.810 --> 00:01:11.750 beat their rivals, the Damascus Dipshits, two to zero. 26 00:01:11.750 --> 00:01:13.380 You might be thinking that two to zero 27 00:01:13.380 --> 00:01:15.580 sounds like an unusual score for football 28 00:01:15.580 --> 00:01:18.400 but remember, football is stupid. 29 00:01:18.400 --> 00:01:21.500 A touchdown is worth 6 points because fuck it. 30 00:01:21.500 --> 00:01:23.780 - I have to interrupt you there Daddy, 31 00:01:23.780 --> 00:01:26.850 we've got breaking traffic news coming in. 32 00:01:26.850 --> 00:01:31.240 For that, we turn to our traffic reporter, Wet Daniel. 33 00:01:31.240 --> 00:01:32.073 Wet? 34 00:01:32.073 --> 00:01:34.090 - A terrible scene here downtown. 35 00:01:34.090 --> 00:01:36.730 A truck full of maple syrup crashed into a vet clinic 36 00:01:36.730 --> 00:01:38.670 on Sunset and Diane Lane. 37 00:01:38.670 --> 00:01:40.850 Drivers are being told to avoid the area 38 00:01:40.850 --> 00:01:43.570 unless they want to see a bunch of sticky lizards 39 00:01:43.570 --> 00:01:46.590 and icky gizzards, fickly drizzards 40 00:01:46.590 --> 00:01:48.700 and straight up dead dogs. 41 00:01:48.700 --> 00:01:51.070 We have reason to believe the truck driver was distracted 42 00:01:51.070 --> 00:01:52.360 at the time of the incident, 43 00:01:52.360 --> 00:01:54.650 yelping for the wettest soups in the area. 44 00:01:54.650 --> 00:01:56.880 We recommend taking the long way around, 45 00:01:56.880 --> 00:01:59.740 take I-95 North and just keep going. 46 00:01:59.740 --> 00:02:01.950 Just drive, and drive. 47 00:02:01.950 --> 00:02:03.070 Find a new town. 48 00:02:03.070 --> 00:02:04.350 Settle down there. 49 00:02:04.350 --> 00:02:06.520 Don't come back until your kids are grown 50 00:02:06.520 --> 00:02:09.510 or, if that's too long, you coward, 51 00:02:09.510 --> 00:02:11.320 you can always take my shortcut, 52 00:02:11.320 --> 00:02:12.940 Tokyo Driftin' on the sidewalk. 53 00:02:12.940 --> 00:02:13.990 Back to you, Daddy. 54 00:02:13.990 --> 00:02:15.710 - Thanks Wet. 55 00:02:15.710 --> 00:02:18.920 Sounds dangerous, but I got to say Wet's always early 56 00:02:18.920 --> 00:02:21.480 and blood can be cleaned off your fender. 57 00:02:21.480 --> 00:02:22.650 - Great stuff. 58 00:02:22.650 --> 00:02:25.840 Well, it's summer, and that means beating the heat 59 00:02:25.840 --> 00:02:28.030 in movie theater air conditioning. 60 00:02:28.030 --> 00:02:30.420 - Movie theaters, a winning combination 61 00:02:30.420 --> 00:02:32.690 of uncomfortable seats, expensive snacks, 62 00:02:32.690 --> 00:02:34.480 and freezing cold temperatures. 63 00:02:34.480 --> 00:02:37.990 - Our film critic, Buzz Aldrin sat down 64 00:02:37.990 --> 00:02:40.020 with a local filmmaker to hear about 65 00:02:40.020 --> 00:02:42.380 the production scene around town. 66 00:02:42.380 --> 00:02:45.060 - Thanks guys, I'm film critic Buzz Aldrin. 67 00:02:45.060 --> 00:02:46.790 I was the second person to walk on the moon, 68 00:02:46.790 --> 00:02:48.550 but let's not get bogged down in that. 69 00:02:48.550 --> 00:02:50.630 I'm here with Mary-Ellen Blankets, 70 00:02:50.630 --> 00:02:53.130 who just made her first movie right here in town. 71 00:02:53.130 --> 00:02:54.510 - Thank you for having me. 72 00:02:54.510 --> 00:02:58.390 - Your movie is called Abbatar and uses the music of Abba 73 00:02:58.390 --> 00:03:00.060 to tell a story about a distant planet 74 00:03:00.060 --> 00:03:02.410 filled with unobtainium mines. 75 00:03:02.410 --> 00:03:03.243 - Yep. 76 00:03:03.243 --> 00:03:04.820 - Tell us about the plot. 77 00:03:04.820 --> 00:03:08.440 - Well it's easy, first of all, 78 00:03:08.440 --> 00:03:10.230 there's only, 79 00:03:10.230 --> 00:03:13.120 anybody who knows Abba, 80 00:03:13.120 --> 00:03:16.300 you know about it, so I don't need to explain it. 81 00:03:16.300 --> 00:03:20.800 But basically, there are a couple different, 82 00:03:20.800 --> 00:03:23.637 okay so we, you like-- 83 00:03:24.520 --> 00:03:25.910 - Some something here, right? 84 00:03:25.910 --> 00:03:30.300 - Yeah, so you know, all your favorites will be there. 85 00:03:30.300 --> 00:03:32.673 It's gonna be, it's gonna be great. 86 00:03:34.580 --> 00:03:35.413 - When you say all your favorites, 87 00:03:35.413 --> 00:03:38.100 do you mean members from Abba or songs by Abba? 88 00:03:38.100 --> 00:03:41.720 - Both, most of the cast is, 89 00:03:41.720 --> 00:03:43.773 and was, members of Abba. 90 00:03:44.620 --> 00:03:49.370 We got a great location to shoot, 91 00:03:49.370 --> 00:03:50.350 and we shot it at-- 92 00:03:50.350 --> 00:03:52.564 - That's mostly what the movie viewers is looking for. 93 00:03:52.564 --> 00:03:53.990 - And we shot it all there. 94 00:03:53.990 --> 00:03:55.650 - Great, well great, that's fabulous. 95 00:03:55.650 --> 00:03:57.260 Now George Clooney is in this movie. 96 00:03:57.260 --> 00:03:59.580 Tell us about all the pranks he pulled on set. 97 00:03:59.580 --> 00:04:01.690 - Oh my gosh, he did this one prank 98 00:04:01.690 --> 00:04:04.850 where he wouldn't come out of his trailer. 99 00:04:04.850 --> 00:04:07.263 It was so funny, we all kept laughing. 100 00:04:08.190 --> 00:04:11.440 I wasn't there for that, but I heard about it. 101 00:04:11.440 --> 00:04:12.790 I heard it was really funny. 102 00:04:12.790 --> 00:04:16.090 And they were all doing fun stuff like that. 103 00:04:16.090 --> 00:04:17.060 Another fun prank-- 104 00:04:17.060 --> 00:04:17.970 - Sorry where you said they were all 105 00:04:17.970 --> 00:04:19.530 doing fun stuff like that but you weren't there 106 00:04:19.530 --> 00:04:21.740 that implies that other people were having fun 107 00:04:21.740 --> 00:04:23.700 and pulling pranks but you were not there? 108 00:04:23.700 --> 00:04:24.940 - That's, yep. 109 00:04:24.940 --> 00:04:27.780 - So, as I said, I am astronaut Buzz Aldrin, 110 00:04:27.780 --> 00:04:29.490 and on a personal note I'd like to know 111 00:04:29.490 --> 00:04:31.910 how Earth's moon plays into this film? 112 00:04:31.910 --> 00:04:34.323 - Well, Earth's moon is actually, 113 00:04:35.380 --> 00:04:40.380 it's around, but it's not affecting the plot in a way 114 00:04:42.880 --> 00:04:46.410 that's real or hard. 115 00:04:46.410 --> 00:04:49.743 It's like, the Earth's moon is like, there. 116 00:04:52.510 --> 00:04:54.900 The Earth's moon is there, and you can see it, 117 00:04:54.900 --> 00:04:59.270 when you watch it at the beginning, you can see 118 00:04:59.270 --> 00:05:01.260 the Earth's moon is there, but it's not affecting 119 00:05:01.260 --> 00:05:02.530 the plot in a hard way. 120 00:05:02.530 --> 00:05:06.640 - So in a way, it's almost like the moon is right now 121 00:05:06.640 --> 00:05:08.880 where it just exists in the world but it doesn't have 122 00:05:08.880 --> 00:05:10.200 a whole lot of effect on our day-to-day lives. 123 00:05:10.200 --> 00:05:12.090 - Yeah, but it has a character name. 124 00:05:12.090 --> 00:05:15.800 The Earth's moon's character, it has a name in my movie. 125 00:05:15.800 --> 00:05:19.960 Whereas, like, we just call it moon, 'cause it's a moon. 126 00:05:19.960 --> 00:05:24.960 But, in my movie we call it David. 127 00:05:25.090 --> 00:05:27.540 - Very good. Well if you gave the moon lines, 128 00:05:27.540 --> 00:05:28.880 what would they be? 129 00:05:28.880 --> 00:05:30.853 - Hey, I'm here too. 130 00:05:32.970 --> 00:05:35.843 - So to be clear, the moon as a character in the movie-- 131 00:05:35.843 --> 00:05:38.180 - 'Scuse me, 'scuse me, 'scuse me. 132 00:05:38.180 --> 00:05:41.530 I have a question about the traffic going to and from set. 133 00:05:41.530 --> 00:05:42.690 - By all means. 134 00:05:42.690 --> 00:05:43.630 - Was it bad? 135 00:05:43.630 --> 00:05:45.420 - Damnit Wet, you interrupt Mary-Ellen Blankets 136 00:05:45.420 --> 00:05:46.630 with "Was it bad?". 137 00:05:46.630 --> 00:05:47.500 What's wrong with you? 138 00:05:47.500 --> 00:05:49.080 - I want to do more than traffic. 139 00:05:49.080 --> 00:05:50.380 Traffic is boring. 140 00:05:50.380 --> 00:05:51.630 - One of these days, Wet. 141 00:05:51.630 --> 00:05:53.750 Pow, straight to the moon. 142 00:05:53.750 --> 00:05:55.100 - Or David. - Where I've been. 143 00:05:55.100 --> 00:05:55.933 Or David. 144 00:05:55.933 --> 00:05:58.270 - I actually have an interesting story about traffic. 145 00:05:58.270 --> 00:06:01.573 - Oh, well, if it's interesting, then by all means. 146 00:06:03.570 --> 00:06:07.260 - Basically, I was in my car, and I was driving, 147 00:06:07.260 --> 00:06:10.370 and there were cars in front of me and behind me, 148 00:06:10.370 --> 00:06:13.070 and people were going everywhere. 149 00:06:13.070 --> 00:06:16.340 Like, do you ever, 'cause sometimes, I just think 150 00:06:16.340 --> 00:06:18.290 it's so interesting how, like, I look at traffic 151 00:06:18.290 --> 00:06:20.370 and I'm like, people are going everywhere. 152 00:06:20.370 --> 00:06:21.203 - Yeah. 153 00:06:21.203 --> 00:06:22.400 - People are always going everywhere. 154 00:06:22.400 --> 00:06:23.233 - That is interesting. 155 00:06:23.233 --> 00:06:24.530 - So. 156 00:06:24.530 --> 00:06:26.178 - That was interesting. 157 00:06:26.178 --> 00:06:27.580 (laughing) 158 00:06:27.580 --> 00:06:29.840 - That's it for us, but before we go, we'd like 159 00:06:29.840 --> 00:06:32.190 to acknowledge this week's loser. 160 00:06:32.190 --> 00:06:34.836 Jess Stephanie Meat. 161 00:06:34.836 --> 00:06:37.020 Thanks for watching! 162 00:06:37.020 --> 00:06:42.020 - Aww, I want to hear more about that traffic story. 163 00:06:42.110 --> 00:06:45.890 - Well, everybody goes everywhere, if you think about it. 164 00:06:45.890 --> 00:06:47.990 - I want to hear more lines from the moon.